Recognizing a Gift

Yesterday afternoon I left my house to embark on the youth leaders retreat. It has been so good thus far. Last night we just had a great time of worship and prayer. Real prayer. We prayed over everyone. Screaming, crying-- I think almost everyone cried in some capacity. The Lord had a word for I think everyone here. I for one feel refreshed, and rejuvenated. I feel like a Christian, but more than that I feel like a youth leader. I know that God has a plan for my small group, and I just pray that it will be clear as I present His words. I feel a little messed up. It's been a long time since I've experienced the presence of God in that capacity. I think I often try to hard so get there that I prevent myself from receiving. The presence of God isn't something you can force yourself to experience. It is when you stop trying to receive it and just surrender yourself completely that God will immerse you in His wonder.

That is the problem though isn't it. What does it mean to completely surrender yourself? That is not a natural  progression. In fact I find it to be quite a difficult task. Simply because to surrender means to quit trying. To no longer do anything. And that is the opposite of what is natural. Because we are sinful creatures, unworthy of the love God desires to pour out on us. We think that to get a hold of God we have to live as close to perfect as we can. To earn it. We feel we should have to pray and claw our way through some epic spiritual battleground and then if we are lucky enough God will reward us with a glimpse into His presence. And there are times to crawl through that battleground. However God's presence is a gift. And receiving a gift requires nothing from us. The change in our lives is a result of choosing to receive that gift.

So why is it that so many Christians, such as myself, lose sight of that? Why do we feel that all of a sudden we have to earn the right to be in God's presence? We can never earn that to begin with. We could never be good enough to achieve the rights to something so majestic. That is why it has to be a gift. And all we have to do is receive it.

It doesn't matter where you are in your walk with God. Rather you've been saved your whole life, or you've never truly experienced that presence of God, you can receive it from anywhere. Just open your heart and ask God to reveal himself to you, and stop trying to live up to some righteous idea of how you should be and just receive it.